Self care is confusing sometimes… it’s really person-specific, so I promise you you’re not “doing self care wrong”. For some, self care can be staying off social media, for others it can be taking a break from your own stressors and using social media as a distraction (within reason!).
For me, I’ve found significantly reducing my use of Facebook and Instagram to be extremely liberating. BUT… I’m also human and caught the Tik Tok bug a while ago. There are many different sides of Tik Tok- dancing, pranks, recipes, etc, but there are some creators on the ‘mental health side of Tik Tok’ that have made my life a lot easier during this pandemic. Many are licensed professionals and share their wealth of knowledge in nice little 30-60 second sound bites. This is of course, NOT a substitution for traditional therapy, but between sessions, the following creators might help you connect the dots throughout the week.
If you feel like you’re drowning in your space and don’t have the emotional wherewithal to clean/organize/engage in care tasks, Domestic Blisters is for you. KC Davis is all about making your space FUNCTIONAL and ENOUGH, and not focusing on performative cleaning/organizing as a measure of self worth. My favorite nugget of wisdom from KC? The term “morally neutral”. As she says on her website: “Care tasks are morally neutral. Being good or bad at them has nothing to do with being a good person, parent, man, woman, spouse, friend. Literally nothing. You are not a failure because you can’t keep up with laundry. Laundry is morally neutral.”
If you’re looking to feel heard, check out Matthias J. Barker. Even though he’s doing the talking in these videos, the way Matthias presents information makes it feel like he’s right there with you, listening to and validating your thoughts and feelings. He speaks in a calm and reassuring tone of voice with soft music in the background. His clips on Tik Tok come from his longer videos posted on his YouTube page. He also hashtags the therapy modality he’s targeting at the bottom of each Tik Tok if you’re looking for that information.
If you’re exploring your trauma (particularly how trauma affects the body) your attachment style (people please, much?) and the way in which you communicate with others as it relates to your inner child- the following creators are for you.
Melissaparksays presents information on trauma-informed therapy in a very easy-to-digest manner. She specializes in EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), which is a treatment approach designed to specifically target trauma and PTSD. The method itself can seem a little daunting, but she has a lot of clips about what to expect from EMDR and how it can help. (Bright Spot has therapists that specialize in EMDR as well, so if this is something you’re interested in learning more about, don’t be afraid to reach out!)
Counselor Holly – Holly works with teens on resolving trauma and often makes videos using music to demonstrate the inner-monologue of many of her clients. If you’re a teen, or if you have a teen, or even if you don’t, but you’re still working on some unresolved teen-angst, I highly recommend checking out her Tik Tok channel.
Complex PTSD recovery – I’m not going to lie, Penelope, the creator of this TikTok channel shares SO much information that at times, I personally find it a bit overwhelming. It’s helpful to pause her TikToks every few seconds to really take in the information she shares, because trust me, it’s worth it. She also supports using a “bottom up” approach to therapy- targeting finding safety within the body, before addressing the mind.
If you’re specifically looking for BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, Person of Color) creators, the following may be for you:
The Shani Project – Shani creates content that focuses on multiple areas of mental health, and does so in a way that is inclusive, while addressing specific issues that come up for people of color, both from the client’s and therapist’s perspective. Even if you’re not BIPOC, but want to learn more about BIPOC issues and experiences, check her out!
Michelle DeBruijn – Looking to heal your inner child (and outer child– did you know this was a thing?) and practice self compassion with a mix of spirituality as an adult in this world? Michelle is your person.
If you’re looking for techniques, strategies and metaphors…
Mashmushe – Micheline Maalouf offers step-by-step tips on how to address emotional triggers and uses a Polyvagal approach to help her viewers get more in touch with the physiological responses they have to stress. She offers practical and easy-to-implement strategies to address a variety of emotional difficulties but does so in a way that feels warm and nurturing.
Evolveandbloom – Nadia Addesi is THE QUEEN of metaphors. She breaks down complex psychological concepts and uses easy to understand metaphors to demonstrate the impact of emotional stress and trauma. My favorite? The cup vs. tea-cup person.
Lindsey Fleming, LPC – Although Lindsey works primarily with children and adolescents, she spends a lot of time discussing ADHD and how it impacts the individual across the lifespan, herself included. She has a ton of ideas for how to manage symptoms of ADHD and improve executive functioning.
After you’re done scrolling through Tik Tok and you want to explore some of the topics mentioned in the videos, contact a Bright Spot therapist.
